I have to admit, I’m getting a bit sick of coming back here with “updates,” teasing what’s upcoming, and then ghosting for six or so months because life comes up, or I wasn’t in a conducive position to do what I had wanted/planned. It must have gotten annoying for those of you who stuck around, just to see the “personal” tag denoting the topic on an occasional post. Plus, I pay much more than I probably should for this, so I should be using it. My domain renewal is coming up in April, and, thinking about what a wreck my life had become right after I started this, contemplating cancelling the package and stopping for the time being. But that’s not what will be happening. I will renew, hopefully start pulling in some extra income, and things will be good. Every aspect of what I do is woven into this fabric, and this fabric is my name. So hopefully this will be the last “at length” update post. Unless it’s fun stuff. And I guess a lot of this is fun stuff, so —
I’m not the biggest fan of “the holidays” and the fact that my birthday quickly follows them. It’s been hard to me to stay in good spirits around a time of year when I miss my father so much more than I thought possible. Aside from some family (external, not nuclear) drama, things went as smoothly as possible. At the end of December, I marked a year dating Tav, and getting to that point (a lot of things happened — not trouble, just life) made us both realize that we wanted to invest more time in each other, spend more time and do things together, and since no one in either of our polycules is seeking additional long term partnership at this time, that it would be a great time to start blending our “separate” families together as friends, and whatever else happens. While schedules have given seven people difficulties and left us all reeling at times, we are planning it. I went at visited Tav and his polycule to go to a Roaring 20’s Electrosynth dance night (so much fun!), they drove down to me for a Vikings and Valkyries themed event in my city, and just last weekend (the 8th) I went up again, and Tav and I went to an absolutely fucking amazing rave. (The Old Guards!)
As for Ryan and Lyn (my boyfriend and my girlfriend, and their almost eighteen month old son, Daegan — my more “traditional” relationship— which just passed it’s year mark yesterday), I had a great Christmas and New Years (which I got to see Crystal and Paul for, and meet a new friend!) with them and their family, as well. I can’t believe how fast Daegan is growing now. I feel like he’s grown a little every time I close my eyes. Lyn made me a beautiful mixed media canvas that she painted. It has a big picture of me holding Daegan in the center. That’s one thing that’s super special to me: how close I am with Daegan, and how trusted I am with their son.
We had a great time, and Ryan and I partook in some recreational fun at the UNITY FlowState event, and JUST like I told John (Klicka), his set was amazing and everyone loved it. He and Ryan are playing our April event. After that was my birthday. Lyn cooked Pad Thai (one of my favorites!) and Nick and Evan (Lyn and Ryan’s younger brothers, respectively) were there, and Ryan’s best friend came by with some rad IPA’s and a desert (coffee, peanut butter, dark chocolate stout) beer. I had an amazing time — it had been years since I had done anything at all for my birthday. I also “rang in” my birthday midnight with Tav at Freeplay the night before, and the rave we went to in Cambridge I mentioned earlier was the /fin to my birthday week. In that time, I saw more friends than usual, more often than usual, AND, I have found a new housemate! Finally! RW, my other housemate and I have always gotten along well, but the other woman who lived here constantly annoyed and mothered me (but not RW, even though in reality, he’s five years younger — and this is an apartment, not a boarding house).
Things came to a head starting the evening before UNITY, when she tried to evict me with a handwritten note. I, of course, called my landlord, and he told me that I could stay and that things would be fine. Sparing the drama, cause fuck tons of it is not my thing, I didn’t see her at all, and about a week later my landlord came to tell me that she decided to leave because she and I “don’t get along.” Oh well. Good riddance! Now I just wish she pick up her (boxed, dying,) plants from the back hall and her air conditioner and leave her keys. Then I can give them to Miles, my friend who is moving in. Then I could live my life, focus on other things, and never have to worry about seeing her again, especially like a pop-up book from hell. She really should have been out closer to the beginning of the month, and it’s more than halfway through now. I’ll have to check soon.
ANYWAY, all of this blathering has a point! With her gone, I can go into the other rooms of the apartment to do my hobbies and cook and be generally productive. So since I won’t be trapped in my room the way I was, I’m hoping I’ll be much more productive when it comes to all of the things I’ve been wanting to do, but struggling with.
Right now, since I just fixed up my actual bedroom about a month ago, I’m concentrated on completely overhauling the common rooms — front and back entryways, the parlour, the kitchen, the bathroom, and turning what is/was the spare/junk room (also the room my closet is in since my bedroom doesn’t have one) into a study/storage room we can all use. I’m also making a few changes in my bedroom to accommodate the movement and placement of some things.
Things are coming along great so far, ad my lofty hope is that I’ll get everything finished by mid-March, so that I’ll be able to dedicate more time to my creative and intellectual pursuits.
So while there were a few rough times, I think it was just to make room for even more rad things in 2020. And on the whole, aside from my dad passing, and our home being destroyed (and the whole fibromyalgia thing), my 30’s have been far superior to my 20’s in most ways. Subvert expectations. Do what you want. Have fun. Being in your thirties is the new twenties.